Spooky Season

Spooky Season

The NHL standings sums up more than just who has the most points. In this post we will sum up every NHL team with one sentence for their season so far.

Nashville Predator – When are you raising the Stanley Cup Banner?

Tampa Bay Lightning – How did you make yourselves better than last year?

Toronto Maple Leafs – Your offense looks great, defense wins championships.

Boston Bruins – Toronto and Tampa Bay are in your division.

Colorado Avalanche – Good, not great but good.

Minnesota Wild – You might make the playoffs again, but you will get demolished in the first two rounds again.

Calgary Flames – James Neal the really big waist of salary.

Winnipeg Jets – Waiting to get hot at the right time

Chicago Blackhawks – If the Blues do not make the playoffs you do not have to.

San Jose Sharks – If defense wins championships you have a dynasty.

Vancouver Canucks – Consistency might be your downfall.

Buffalo Sabres – Win something besides the draft lottery.

Montreal Canadiens – The Canadiens consists of the real life misfit toys from Rudolph

Pittsburgh Penguins – Crosby cannot carry this team forever right?

Carolina Hurricanes – Put a goalie in the net and you will win a lot of games.

Edmonton Oilers – McDavid can and will carry this team alone.  

New York Islanders – My heart hurts for you when I see Tavares score a goal with Toronto, and he scores a lot.

Arizona Coyotes – At least you have cool 3rd jerseys?

Columbus Blue Jackets – I can start a gofundme for Panarin’s contract.

Dallas Stars – Stars should be good right?

Anaheim Ducks – The Mighty Ducks from the movie could beat you.

Washington Capitals – Call air traffic control because you are FLYING under the radar.

New Jersey Devils –  When Hall doesn’t score all your goals you do not score goals.

Vegas Golden Knights – Sophomore year killed my GPA, it seems to be killing yours too.

Philadelphia Flyers – I have been rooting against you because of Gritty the dust rabbit mascot.

Ottawa Senators – Remember that one time you almost went to the Stanley Cup Final?

New York Rangers – How is the self imposed rebuild going?

St. Louis Blues – Doug Armstrong is going to be blue in the face figuring out why you are this low in the standings.

Detroit Red Wings – Get comfy at the bottom of the standings.

LA Kings – I am not mad, I am just disappointed at the hockey you are playing.

Florida Panthers – Didn’t you almost make the playoffs?